Silence is not associated with good conversations. In social situations, we value those with the knack to keep on talking, the friends who can parry every awkward pause and slip-up with wit, erudition and a smile. “Conversation should touch everything, but should concentrate itself on nothing,” counseled Oscar Wilde—a man who was himself so blessed with the gift of the gab that even his adversaries (and he had many) would admit to being relieved to see him across the table at a dinner party.

But often, in a crowded room, it is not the people talking the loudest who are most in control. In Pride and Prejudice, it was Mr. Darcy’s appearance of being above the fray of societal tittle-tattle that made him the object of Elizabeth’s affections. Almost two centuries later, everywoman...